The Burrito Blog
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Matrimony And Guacamole
See also: Burritos Freed From Sandwich Shackles
Monday, September 22, 2008 by Jonah. Permalink for Matrimony And Guacamole
Adult Large Burrito Shirts Sold Out
There are no more adult large I Heart Burritos shirts in stock. I'm not sure if more will be ordered.
Update: Adult Extra Large and Adult Small are sold out now also. Only have Youth Large and Medium left.
Sunday, September 14, 2008 by Jonah. Permalink for Adult Large Burrito Shirts Sold Out
Cheesecake Factory: Burrito Is Enchilada
Beans, rice, salsa and guacamole are on the outside of the tortilla. Melted cheese on top. Come on. En-chi-la-da. They did get the grande part right though. This thing weighed in at two pounds even. That's pretty big.
From the menu:
Factory Burrito Grande: $12.95Undeclared ingredients included corn, peas, and a rogue french fry invader. No sour cream by request. From here on, the alleged Factory Burrito Grande will be referred to as the Factory Enchilada Grande.
A monster burrito with chicken, cheese, rice, onions and peppers. Topped with guacamole, sour cream, salsa y cilantro. Served with black beans and rice.
The enchilada was provided as a birthday gift via PayPal, courtesy of John Furnari. Company was provided by Cora, slightly embarrassed to be seen in a restaurant with a digital scale, notepad, and camera.
Would I get the Factory Enchilada Grande again? Probably, but only when compelled by factors beyond my control to dine at the Cheesecake Factory. I generally don't like waiting 70-90 minutes for food that I think is average and overpriced. Other Cheesecake Factory experiences make the Factory Enchilada Grande a standout menu item, but that's another problem.
FDR analysis reveals that despite the preposterous size, the enchilada was less economical than most.
Weight: 32.0 oz | Price: $12.95 | FDR: 2.47
Friday, June 01, 2007 by Jonah. Permalink for Cheesecake Factory: Burrito Is Enchilada
Five Stars Meet Chile Rellenos
With Taqueria La Mexicana's amazing chile rellenos just around the corner, I decided to see how those from East Coast Grill measured up. And hit the bloody mary bar.
Priced at $11.75 and available only during Sunday brunch, here's the menu description:
Stuffed with Smoked Duck, Jack Cheese, Cilantro, Roasted Potatoes, Garlic Seared Greens & Loca Salsa Rojo
Restaurants with table service are frequently ineligible for Burrito Blog coverage, but this meal needs to be shared. People need to be notified. It was just that good.
I was completely blown away. Most nice restaurants seem to mutilate my favorite Mexican dishes during the gourmetization process. Not so here. The duck was tender with the perfect complement of greens and potatoes.
The bloody mary didn't hurt either. Best Sunday brunch in recent memory.
Monday, May 21, 2007 by Jonah. Permalink for Five Stars Meet Chile Rellenos
Have You Seen These Tacos?
Tuesday, May 15, 2007 by Jonah. Permalink for Have You Seen These Tacos?
Peri-Peri Hot Sauce Reviewed By Expert
Three bottles arrived: Medium Peri-Peri, Hot Sweet Peri-Peri, and Garlic Peri-Peri. What is Peri-Peri (a.k.a. African Birdseye)? From Wikipedia:
African Birdseye is a cultivar of the chili pepper that grows both wild and domesticated. It is a small and extremely spicy member of the capsicum plant genus.
I liked the Medium sauce the most - not because of the heat factor but the flavor. Despite the 'medium' namesake, I found it to pack to most punch. But I'm outside my field of expertise here. I specialize in burritos, not sauce.
Shane said the Hot Sweet sauce was definitely not destined for glory atop a burrito. Maybe Chinese food. The Garlic sauce he paired with fries. Only the Medium was burrito appropriate.
Wow, my taste buds are aligned with greatness.
The entire office agreed. Of the three bottles donated to public use, the Medium is long gone.
See also: Tequila Hot Sauce and Hot Sauce Blog.
Saturday, May 12, 2007 by Jonah. Permalink for Peri-Peri Hot Sauce Reviewed By Expert
Burrito Fit For A King Of The Jungle
Zoo keepers were unavailable to comment on the burrito filling, but speculation points to antelope, gazelle, warthog, wildebeest, buffalo or zebra burritos as lion favorites.
Photo taken at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas. That town is nutty.
Sorry, dear readers, for not posting much recently. I have been out of town for a two week wedding extravagana '07. Time to get back to eating and typing.
Monday, April 30, 2007 by Jonah. Permalink for Burrito Fit For A King Of The Jungle
Pink Taco Taste Testing
- are lame
- have table service
Chicago's Junior Burrito Analyst Ethan and I met up at the Pink Taco in the Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas for a snack before the inevitable mess that being a bachelor party attendee would bring. He swore that someone wanted to make the Cardinals play in Pink Taco Stadium. The kid doesn't lie.
We both got the house special, the panuchos, a.k.a. Pink Tacos. Hey, when in Rome.
Pickled onions. That's the pink stuff.
They were worth the money for sure, but half the draw of the restaurant is absurd ambiance, which Burrito Blog conveys poorly. Ethan didn't like the pink onions, and I had a problem with their single tortilla tacos. Come on, don't skimp me on the cheapest part of the meal. Legit tacos have two tortillas.
Fans of Chili's and Hooters, you'll probably love this place.
Monday, April 23, 2007 by Jonah. Permalink for Pink Taco Taste Testing
I Have Been Eating Burritos In Secret
Two weeks would be the longest I've gone without eating a burrito in the last 5 years. The truth is, I've been gluttonous. I've been eating and not sharing. Not sharing tales of my beans and rice with you.
Please forgive me.
Meals from the last couple weeks have all been weighed and recorded as part of the FDR project, and reviews of those meals will get posted eventually.
The chicken burrito pictured will remain unidentified. Let it pay tribute to all burritos that have passed without documentation.
Like the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier, this is the post of the unknown burrito.
Thursday, January 04, 2007 by Jonah. Permalink for I Have Been Eating Burritos In Secret
Food To Dollar Ratio
That's right, we're going to start weighing our burritos. The primary goal of the FDR is to settle questions of burrito efficiency; ending the burrito size debate is a secondary benefit.
Buying a digital scale from Amazon might land me on a drug dealer watch list. I'm willing to take the risk in the name of burrito science.
Update: Just to clear up any confusion, the weight of plates, baskets, or any other weighty vessels used in food delivery are not included in calculations.
Friday, November 24, 2006 by Jonah. Permalink for Food To Dollar Ratio
Fries In California Burritos
- Avocado
- Sprouts
- Tofu
- French Fries
The fact remains that many establishments located in California (San Diego specifically) feature French fries in their California burritos.
Paris is 5,688 miles away from San Diego. Lesson learned: French fries and burritos have no borders.
Friday, November 24, 2006 by Jonah. Permalink for Fries In California Burritos
Google Cruise: Bad Burrito Results Found
No surprise, I was in attendance.
I ran into some familiar faces, like Steve Silva, the big dog of Boston Dirt Dogs.
While Google provides great results for just about anything you seek on the Internet, they failed to provide good burritos at this catered event. The chicken was ok and so was the guacamole, but there's no excuse for this tortilla: paper thin and prone to breakage.
As a result, I tossed my burrito pictured above, and focused on the free drinks. A mistake? Perhaps.
Thursday, August 10, 2006 by Jonah. Permalink for Google Cruise: Bad Burrito Results Found
We're Watching You, Rainbow
There were two things I hadn't counted on. First, the extremely short duration of time spent in LA after the ride. Second, the complete lack of interest of the rest of my team in finding a taqueria.
Instead, they insisted on a loud, overpriced, disgusting dive called the Rainbow Bar & Grill, which featured a man dressed like Gene Simmons and an entire group of ten guys all dressed like Poison.
Still, I remained true to the mission and ordered an "Apple Burrito" from the dessert menu. But this Apple Burrito was no burrito. Rather, it was apple pie filling wrapped in a piece of pie crust, made to look like a burrito. And that would have been ok, except that it was horrible.
Rainbow Bar & Grill has besmirched the name of the burrito for their own selfish purpose of selling substandard food. We're watching you, Rainbow.
Below is the final list of the Burrito Blog faithful who donated to support the fight against AIDS:
Megan James
Louis Haywood
Dov Sharon
Taqueria El Buen Sabor
Mary Mazzocco
Nick Lindauer
Cathy Hsu
Nathan Slavik
David Szabo
"Big" Mike Schwimmer
Jonah Feld
Wednesday, July 12, 2006 by Phil. Permalink for We're Watching You, Rainbow
Not Chips, Strips
While on the fringe of foods appropriate for Burrito Blog, they're healthier than potato chips and taste better, too.
Friday, December 09, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Not Chips, Strips
The Best Looking Sauce
Although I personally prefer the green sauces to the red, cayenne based sauces, all in the office agreed unanimously: Eve is better than Tabasco.
Tuesday, August 30, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for The Best Looking Sauce
Down The Shore: Belmar
Belmar (Map) has to be the laziest man's town in Jersey.
Cheesesteaks, subs and 30 packs of beer aren't the only thing that can be ordered for delivery. 10th Ave Burrito will deliver burritos anywhere in Belmar almost any time of day or night.
That includes the beach.
The chicken burrito with hot sauce is the spiciest burrito I've ever eaten. Burritos and the shore on a hot day don't really mix but it’s something I had to try.
Sunday, August 07, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Down The Shore: Belmar
Jambalaya Burrito De Furnari
Background: Junior Burrito Analyst John Furnari, creator of the previously mentioned burrito.
According to Wikipedia, the only site better than Burrito Blog, Jambalaya is:
Jambalaya is a variety of rice-based dish common in Louisiana Cajun or Creole cooking. It probably derives from the Spanish dish paella, possibly brought to Louisiana when Spain controlled the territory comprising the future Louisiana Purchase.
According to me, a Jambalaya burrito is:
Free breakfast
This {Other} meal was rated: .
Thursday, July 07, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Jambalaya Burrito De Furnari
Yes, It Has Tequila In It
I tossed this bottle of Blair's Jalapeño Death to John, coworker and Junior Burrito Analyst, at which point he exclaimed, "Yo it has tequila in it!"
This sauce was excellent on my boiled chicken plate - so excellent that I put it on my oatmeal the next morning.
Don't do that.
Friday, June 17, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Yes, It Has Tequila In It
IHOP Gives You Pimples
It was about 2:30 AM and a decision was made to head to IHOP in Brighton. It was gross. First it took about an hour to seat 14 of us, and then the food was kind of, well, typical of IHOP.
Why didn't we go to Felipe's? It was the liquor.
Wednesday, May 25, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for IHOP Gives You Pimples
Burrito Barter
Check this out:
Laptop / Notebook Bag / Carrying Case: $5
I never use it. It's a black laptop bag with shoulder strap and lots of little pockets inside. I plan on taking the proceeds and squandering them on a burrito.
Oh, yeah, I'm selling the laptop bag.
Tuesday, May 24, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Burrito Barter
The Aftermath
I have a serious problem with wasting food, I just can't let it happen. I guess my parents really drilled that into my head when I was little, but I really believe it - to the point of making myself woozy.
Thursday, May 19, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for The Aftermath
Harvard Reputation Slipping
The burritos pictured above were obviously pre-frozen and were a bit dry. Regretfully, the Harvard dining staff also seemed to be winding down the school year, like the students, providing us with less toppings (salsa and sour cream) than on a typical burrito day (guacamole, salsa, sour cream, onions).
This was also the debut of the quesadilla, pictured top left. This too left lots to be desired. The quesadilla was made to order, but had too high of a bean to cheese ratio and very little flavoring.
With only 10 meals to use on a meal plan each week, I advise against using one for the burrito lunch.
The above review was written by Junior Burrito Analyst Zach Morello.
This {Other} meal was rated: .Tuesday, May 10, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Harvard Reputation Slipping
Carnitas Cupcake
How fitting.
Carnitas is pork. Get it? Get it?
Saturday, May 07, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Carnitas Cupcake
I Was Born On Cinco De Mayo
You all know what I want for my birthday (free lunch).
You all know how to give it to me (link at right).
Seriously, if anyone buys me lunch they get to pick the place - just say in the PayPal form where you want me to go, and then I'll blog about my birthday burrito.
Mom, you are not eligible.
Wednesday, May 04, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for I Was Born On Cinco De Mayo
Human Resources Oversight
John and I rule at recruiting. However, today we made a critical blunder.
While impressed with a kid from Northeastern University, we forgot to ask him what he likes for lunch. What were we thinking?!
Tuesday, May 03, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Human Resources Oversight
San Francisco Burrito Review Source
I came across a Bay Area burrito review site that appeals to my penchant for statistics and charts. Have a look for yourself.
Once Burrito Blog opens up a travel agency, we will organize a San Francisco tortilla tasting tour.
Sunday, May 01, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for San Francisco Burrito Review Source
Washington DC Burrito Synopsis
David Szabo, Mike Schwimmer and I stomped all over the city in search of the finest burrito. These establishments include The Burro, Chipotle, Baja Fresh, Burrito Brothers, The Well Dressed Burrito, Lauriol Plaza, Taco Bell, Julia's Empanadas, Las Placitas, and California Tortilla (Bethesda). There are more places you can get yourself some frijoles in DC, but this is what I remember.
Of all these, I have to say The Well Dressed Burrito and California Tortilla were the best. Maybe you could even sneak Lauriol Plaza onto the list of finalists. Watch out for wacky hours at The Well Dressed Burrito. They pull some nonsense like being open 11:30 am - 2:00 pm Monday through Friday only.
California Tortilla has a ton of hot sauces and burrito recipe options but was a little too far away for regular consumption.
The burrito scene in Washington DC was pretty poor, but inspired me to make my own burritos, as mentioned in my burrito bio. This was, of course, a failure, and the lack of tortilla goodness forced me to flee the city.
Sunday, April 24, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Washington DC Burrito Synopsis
Goya Salsita A Mi Casa
This {Other} meal was rated: .
Tuesday, April 19, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Goya Salsita A Mi Casa
Never Let Me Cook
Then Rich and I jumped around to a couple house parties and had a great time.
Sunday, April 17, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Never Let Me Cook
Tijuana Ty
You can even see it goes straight from the grill into his face. I need to go to Mexico.
Sunday, April 10, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Tijuana Ty
Shield Your Eyes
Andrew!
What are you thinking? The tortilla will never come out of the microwave the way it comes out of the steamer.
The man was desperate. Both he and the burrito have all of my sympathies.
Friday, April 08, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Shield Your Eyes
Ty Releases His Rage
My manager, Ty Velde, shows this feeble quesadilla who's in charge.
Monday, April 04, 2005 by Jonah. Permalink for Ty Releases His Rage
